CHEVY TRAVERSE

CHEVY TRAVERSE

Other Chevrolet models have hauled the family to grandma’s easily, but the eight-year old Chevy Traverse is a winner as a replacement for the minivan because the cool, manly looks trump the boxy appearance of many of Chevy’s vehicles. It seats eight and there’s room for cargo to boot, all in a nimble crossover. This car inspires more than just mini-van lovers. It’s a popular every-person vehicle, and Chevy intuitively filled it with neat goodies. While it’s not the most macho ride, it’s the smoothest. Conspiracy freaks know that of all the SUVs intended to replace this minivan, the Traverse is the best of the bunch. The rear infotainment system is reportedly very family friendly. If you like a reliable vehicle with nifty extras the kids will enjoy, go for the Chevy Traverse.

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NISSAN CUBE

NISSAN CUBE

The Cube is the car no man admits they like. How could such a car replace the minivan? The value is in the fact that kids think it’s a toy. They enjoy riding in it. It seats five and still has cargo space in back. The headroom and leg room surprises and impresses most manly men. The Cube is for real because of its spacious interior and reasonable cost to run. It gets 25 mpg city 30 mpg highway, a number that is a little better than most minivans. What works for families is the very thing that puts people off about it, the square edges. All that squaring in the interior translates into something big and roomy. There’s seating for five and optional cargo space.

The kids’ imaginations will be fired by its shape, your neighbors will admire your guts, and it comes with many features at the base level.

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VW TOUAREG

VW TOUAREG

The VW Touareg looks both big enough and nimble enough to replace the minivan. The sticker price may shock rich entrepreneurs, and the mileage figures may be a little shady, but who cares? Look at the sunroof! It’s so big, it’s like they designed the Touareg to tour Jurassic World. Where are the kids? Let’s go!

Despite all the luxury items in the new Touareg, it’s hard to miss the manly fun in this crossover. The powerful V6 engine comes in all trim levels. The alloy wheels turn heads, and when you drive by, people think “performance,” not “family.” It also luxuriously seats five adults. With double wishbone front suspension and independent four-link rear suspension, the nimble handling of the Touareg wins virile guys over pretty quickly.

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GMC YUKON

GMC YUKON

It’s weird, but some pretty butch females gravitate to this monster. That’s as close as the GMC Yukon will ever get to being unmanly. If automotive dictionaries had an entry for “manly,” this is truck that would be pictured. The massive V-8 engine produces amazing horse power and torque. It will not only carry a load of kids but will take off pretty fast on the other side of the school zone. This truck is about dauntless power. It’s stout-hearted all the way.

With all that manliness, let’s try to remember the little ones we abandoned to the interior. The three rows of bucket seats and a bench seats guarantee the kids will be secure. The Yukon has plenty of room for passengers, big and small. Sure, a kid looks lost in the auditorium-like space, but once buckled down and streaming a favorite Online Disney show, they’re smiling. Except for the lack of lumbar support, this is the most courageous choice to replace the minivan.

Can you imagine explaining to the spouse a Yukon in the driveway? That takes guts.

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JEEP PATRIOT

JEEP PATRIOT

At the risk of retracing the minivan inspiration back to the beaches at Normandy, let’s visit some Jeeps. After all, they dubbed one the “wagoneer” decades back. Jeep’s long tradition of family transportation is well documented, but if you want ballsy traction, ground clearance, vigorous maneuverability and stream fording abilities, the Jeep Patriot will bring it.

Moreover, the Patriot does the chores that every minivan is expected to do: The seats hug the kids, LCD monitors entertain them and the toys are ensnared in a cargo space with the power of a Severus Snape spell. With an engaging engine and a five-speed manual transmission, it’s pretty swashbuckling candidate to replace the minivan.

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